When is the “perfect time?” How do perfectionism and time interplay in our lives? How can I make things perfect without missing out on everything else?

Balance, folks. We all hear about it, we all strive for it (or feel like we should), we all fear losing it or never having it. But what if we do it wrong? What if we think we have balance but we’re really just missing something? Our old friend fear comes to visit once again.

Let’s just take a breath for a second, here. Hit this one step at a time. Perfection is this golden orb that means that everything is right, we have nothing to worry about, nothing is undone, and so we don’t need to think about it anymore. Huh. We are human beings, right? Homo sapiens literally means “wise human” and it means that we are people who “have experience, knowledge, and good judgment.” Here we go again with the definitions, but it is important we are clear. You are, by definition, already wise and knowing. Your gifts include the ability to think and to increase your knowledge, act so that you increase your experience, and consider to increase your ability to judge. It’s not necessary to remove things from our life that require reconsideration, action, or emotional response. Perfection isn’t important or even relevant to our lives. “Say, what?! You cannot possibly mean that. Perfection is the ideal!” Ok, so this is why our lives are out of balance.

How does perfectionism interact with time? Because in a quest for perfection we feel we do not have enough time. Not enough time to make something perfect, not enough time to do the other things we want to do because we’re trying to make something perfect, not enough time for whatever. Then we get down on ourselves for being hard on ourselves. Good grief.

Here’s the reality: to be perfect something must be completed, and things are only done once they are considered done. I can hear you arguing, “but what about a cake? What about a war? What about building a house?” Just pause for a second and I bet you can answer these questions on your own. A cake is done when it is done the way we like it. A war is done when every single person affected has healed, in other words when they have decided it was done for them. A house is finished when the last detail is completed, and anyone with a home knows this day never arrives. So…the answer to perfectionism and time is to DECIDE it is done, to DECIDE how to spend time, and to DECIDE we have time.

“But deciding is so much work! That’s work, right…to make decisions?” You are making decisions every moment, anyway, so why not make the decisions that bring you peace? Why not decide that it is OK to move on, OK to take a break, OK to decide that you’ve done enough for one day. You are enough. You are Homo sapiens. Actually, you are technically Homo sapiens sapiens, which means that you are doubly wise. And all you need to do to live up to that is to trust yourself, grab a cup of tea, and enjoy what you have already accomplished. It is enough.